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Written by Mipsacri on June 16th, 2009.
Viewed 161 times. 8 comments left. 16 people have liked this blog. This blog is hidden from the front page.
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Bah. That makes me kind've mad.
Over the past few weeks, we've been visiting the counselor on and off, and I was feeling very good about today's meeting. Things have been going great from my perspective, and I've been feeling really happy and upbeat. I assume Mike has been happier too, since he hasn't shown otherwise, and when I try to bring up the relationship, he's all, 'Do we have to talk about this right now?' So, my husband calls me 30 minutes before the meeting, asking if I can reschedule. I say, okay, thinking that this is a good sign, maybe things are getting better! However, I decide to just go solo this week, since I rescheduled last week, and I think it's good to keep him updated.
I talked with the councilor about my relationship, and how it's been feeling better, and we've both been trying really hard, but I've been worried of falling back in love with him (which I keep finding myself doing), because I'm afraid he'll still leave at any moment. Dr. B told me not to think about it too much, and although it'd be too much to 'test the relationship waters' everyday, try to bring it up with him at least once a week, and to work on making more agreements, to see if we can meet up on more levels.
So, I get home, excited to talk to Mike about it, feeling like we're making real progress, and we start talking, then I notice something's bothering him, so I stop and I'm like 'What's wrong?' and he tells me that he hasn't felt any happier, and that he's not making me as happy as he could, and that he didn't think we were working out, and he felt more like an older brother. This to me, felt like a punch in the stomach, since I feel like we've been doing better, and I find myself falling for him again and again. Goddamnit.
He suggests a trial separation, and he's like, what do you think? And I'm about to talk, and he's like, 'But don't take anything into consideration that I just said.' And really, how can I not?! I thought we were doing much better, that we were on our way back up, and he's just has shot me down. Again. I tell him I have to take into consideration what he said, because a marriage is a group effort, and although previously I was thinking it was getting better, I want him to feel happy too, so I think this is the next best step.
By this point, he says that maybe I can't make him happy, and maybe he got married too early. So, he says he wants to separate, and that he'll go stay with his friend Joe for a couple of weeks/months. He's coming back to pick up his shit today.
I gotta say: FML.
~Mip
Over the past few weeks, we've been visiting the counselor on and off, and I was feeling very good about today's meeting. Things have been going great from my perspective, and I've been feeling really happy and upbeat. I assume Mike has been happier too, since he hasn't shown otherwise, and when I try to bring up the relationship, he's all, 'Do we have to talk about this right now?' So, my husband calls me 30 minutes before the meeting, asking if I can reschedule. I say, okay, thinking that this is a good sign, maybe things are getting better! However, I decide to just go solo this week, since I rescheduled last week, and I think it's good to keep him updated.
I talked with the councilor about my relationship, and how it's been feeling better, and we've both been trying really hard, but I've been worried of falling back in love with him (which I keep finding myself doing), because I'm afraid he'll still leave at any moment. Dr. B told me not to think about it too much, and although it'd be too much to 'test the relationship waters' everyday, try to bring it up with him at least once a week, and to work on making more agreements, to see if we can meet up on more levels.
So, I get home, excited to talk to Mike about it, feeling like we're making real progress, and we start talking, then I notice something's bothering him, so I stop and I'm like 'What's wrong?' and he tells me that he hasn't felt any happier, and that he's not making me as happy as he could, and that he didn't think we were working out, and he felt more like an older brother. This to me, felt like a punch in the stomach, since I feel like we've been doing better, and I find myself falling for him again and again. Goddamnit.
He suggests a trial separation, and he's like, what do you think? And I'm about to talk, and he's like, 'But don't take anything into consideration that I just said.' And really, how can I not?! I thought we were doing much better, that we were on our way back up, and he's just has shot me down. Again. I tell him I have to take into consideration what he said, because a marriage is a group effort, and although previously I was thinking it was getting better, I want him to feel happy too, so I think this is the next best step.
By this point, he says that maybe I can't make him happy, and maybe he got married too early. So, he says he wants to separate, and that he'll go stay with his friend Joe for a couple of weeks/months. He's coming back to pick up his shit today.
I gotta say: FML.
~Mip
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But like you said, marriage is a group effort, and you can't force him to stay with you. Not that you are but I'm just saying...
I'm sorry. :(
But I am not, at all, saying that it's your fault. Some guys just have a reason to act flaky in marriages/ relationships. Perhaps a separation is a good thing. It would probably determine if he's really in this marriage for you and him... or if he's regretting everything he's made. And after everything's said and done you might see him as he really is and not who you pictured him to be.
He should be mindful though, he's not divorced just separated... I don't want to worry you or anything but when things turn out like this I always have a feeling that He's going to end up doing something that will completely piss you off and loose faith in him and he'll regret it for the rest of his life... I should know... because it had happened to me.
With that being said and done, why don't you go out on friday with some of your female friends and "paint the town red"... it'll take your mind of this crazy foolishness you're husband has thrown at you.
~Mip
Not that i know what im talking about, just a random thot. good luck :D