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The Blog That's About Absolutely Nothing or Everything, But Most Likely Not (dot)

Tagged as: something you might wanna read.

Written by lazydame on April 14, 2012
(dot, dot)...It All Depends on your Viewpoint (And If You expand here, this title will get even more ridiculously long) (For some humor related to our economy, the option to expand this title only available for a limited time)

What's the most surprising thing I could think of to say in such a situation that would really blow your minds away? Although, is that even what I want? Because if I blow up your minds right at the beginning, you would have no way of reading this blog since your thinking and judging abilities would have been....misplaced....well, let's not sugarcoat it. BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will forgo blowing away your minds and instead write this: What I'm putting here, are bits and pieces to something I wrote a long time ago for the old site. At the time, I think I thought it would have been one of my most crazy reports(?) of my adventures thus far. Now, I hope I sound at least a little bit more mature. To be honest, I don't even know why a few put up with my writing. It consistently manages to stray off-subject and be confusing. This part might be for the nostalgic people who read my blogs...

So, read if you want, skip if you want. It might provide an idea of what kind of writing I did for the old site and maybe act as a transition.
It's not at all important to read it to understand what comes after it. I left out a lot of parts too.

FAIR WARNING: This blog is kind of about nothing. By having written something, I have been unsuccessful in writing nothing. So, in some kind of way, this is 'kind of about nothing.' I couldn't really tell you why though...I hear 'google' is helpful. So, don't say I wasted your time, unless you want to. I sincerely apologize ahead of time.

All the old stuff is in italics. (hopefully!) ...and centered?



King of weird titles? ! ? ! ? ! ? !
Alas, I return with news to tell you! I have seized the title king captive and ask to be crowned the king of weird titles!
If thou denies, then you shallz not get the (uhh thinks of medieval time snack) the corn of pop? Lol, sorry, best I could come up with!

(skipped parts)

Blogologalagalacka!
Oh gee, I seem to have a fever blog, I might just end up barfing this blog out!

(skipped parts)

*Flaming leopard crashes through the window and pounces on me* Uh, technical difficulties! *shing* *pow* *pow* *throws dee at leppard* *puts glasses on the leppard*
Leppard: Oh, I can see! What bafflement! This is not my place of residence! I am truly sorry innocent and handsome person for bursting into your house in this manner!
Me: Ehhh, next time use the front door!

(skipped parts)

(Hooray, go Damian!)(Yay, I LIKE COCA COLA!)(0.o)(Hey, I deserve a coca cola! You think they can hear us if we talk in parenthi?)(No, Damian, don’t be crazy, they don’t know we’re insane!)
(Or STAR WARS EPISODE 7: YODA DOES YOGA!)
lazydame: YEAH, CUFT TO FE NEXFT PARFFFT! (I experimentally ate a cookie for that just to see how to say that! Now, that’s commitment!

(skipped parts)

That's it? !



No flaming monkeys? !

No annoying advertisements? !

No famous and stupid laziness? !

No freshly baked. . .*everyone prepares to kill me*. . .chicken chocolate potatoes. . . . . . ? !

The cookies are over there! Ha! Since this is a blog, you can't see where I am pointing!

*Pointing east at the table* WHA? ! Fingers! How could you type that? ! !

OMG, looks like the fat pandas are eating the cookies that the wookies so kindly provided!

Time to use my training skills!



WHAT THE BLOG! THIS IS BLOGGING BLOGGY! THOSE BLOGGING BLOGGERS!



Once again, I am dumbstruck as to how to end this blog!

(Someone's name), can you punch me again? !



*throws blog into toaster* Blog Toast!

*eats blog*

Ha, you guys can't read the blog in my stomach!

You can? ! Okay, that's just wild! Well, my blogs are out of the ordinary!



To start off this blog, I would like to mention. . .

Wait, now I'm just reverting back to the beginning. . .

That's the complete opposite of what I desire!



Did I mention. . .

~LaZz*sliced and diced by ninjas with pancake daggers*



48594035949503048958239273748237403204

34723894057487593485743857439574895778

48537485974895734987219137817392879837

09844549830948923984298423840891980480

75489530493845728937489279371797527983

MUST END THIS WITH TEH MATRIX!

Ohh, look a twix, I mean trix, I mean *smashes blog with frying pan!*



Tune in next time to STARS WARS 9: THE END OF THIS BLOG!



~BONZAI!~ (lol, bet you expected ~laZzz! Ha!)

Hey, that is just unright!

(OMG, Stop it Damian! Just end the thing!)(I DONT WANNA, DAMIAN!)(PREPARE FOR STAR WARS COOKIE SABER FIGHT!)



This has been a Lazydame Blog brought to you by the creators of post-it-notes and trees and penguins and bad movies that no one wants to view and bicycles and boats and pets and most of all: ducks!



Have a nice, extroardinary, almost, full of ducks, quacky, unboring, snowy, isleep, noonecares, iownafirelizard, unfullofdumannoyingmessageslikethisonethatyou'rereallytryingsohardtoreadandwhichisalsosohardtotypewithoutbeingtemptedtopressspacebarwhenijustdidandcookie! Yeah, cookie probably was a word that was noticed!

~LaZzz. . .byebyebyebyebyeseeyalatercloudstastelikechips


I sure had an imagination...and a lot of parentheses
This is something you would have seen from me a long time ago...Disgusting! Right?
Well, not anymore. Today, begins a new reign...err, day! Wait, that's a bit redundant. Uh... Today begins (I'm thinking, I'm thinking) period! I mean: Today begins. Okay, so we have established that the day has indeed begun. So, what now?
Wow, haven't done this in a bit. Writing something, I mean.

Hmmm...well, let's go from the part about the start of a new day as a jumping off point. That was the whole point of that big organization of words: smashed together to form something barely readable, comprehensible, and I could probably come up with more adjectives but I won't.

(By the way, this way of writing is just an experiment. I can tell you it's fun, so...I'm trying it. But if you readers disapprove, then I'll try something new. Most likely, I'll be trying out a bunch of different ideas and ways of writing. (Disclaimer: this might be my only blog T.T) I like to be weird and creative and SURPRISING! Yeah... I mean YEEEAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhh(-decibels gradually declining-)

So, so, so, building up the suspense. Revealing something about your intentions can be...to be very redundant and perhaps a bit annoying...revealing. Look at that, I didn't even bother to generate any synonyms to replace that with.

Alright, let's break down these walls keeping the truth inside. I sat down and started writing. Too vague? Because that sentence is exactly what I mean and there's no need to over-think it. There's no overlying message or anything of importance you could take away from this blog (or maybe, you could determine that I'm insane and avoid future pieces of writing from me). I just began writing this, with no specific idea in mind, other than a desire to write. So, there is absolutely no point to this blog and no well-known documented reason you should have read this. Well, maybe I'm being a bit egotistical. Why would anyone document anything about this? Hmmm...I could immediately proceed to repopulate this world with clones whom (yeah, the green crazy line under the word told me to write 'whom') do exactly as I do. And then, when they have flipped from the minority to the majority, THEY could document. Who am I kidding? 'I' wouldn't even document this.

Well, the word document is scary, because it connotes some important thing you might need for something serious, and I don't feel like being serious. So, seriously, let's stop saying doc...brrr, I just shivered. From this point on, refer to the next paragraph. (Yep, I just told you a new paragraph is in fact imminent, effectively calling you dumb. Nah, I'm sorry, if you've read this far, you're awesome.)

As, I was explaining, there's no point to this writing. I don't know how you could all be so dense since I even mentioned it in the title. Are you reading this because you're bored? (Key in your answer in the next 20 seconds, although I don't know where...It's highly probable that this function D.N.E. (Does Not Exist...damn you, math!))(I even got the whole multiple parenthesis thing going on..., for those of you who have ever taken calc, you'll get this.)

That last part was definitely confusing. (By the way, I could never ever, EVER spell definitely correctly before, so now I mentally pronounce it like de-FINE-Nigh-telly. Interesting fact? ...probably not.)

Let's recap because I keep going off point. A. I'm writing this with no real structure; just writing for the sake of it. B. You're reading this... Hence, I have successfully wasted your time. And now, to be a real mean kid, I'll thank you for your time. Wait, a second, I've wasted my time writing this too, and the time I took of yours, I can't even have...wow, thanks a lot readers. Geeze...I'm going to stop wasting more ti.
.
.
.
.
.
aLRIGHT, i'LL gIVE yOU A fEW mORE sECONDS.
Bye!


(A little note: What did you think? I know it's probably confusing in some parts, but again, I honestly just sat down. Then, I said, to myself, let's write. Stream of thought writing...What was I thinking? About writing! So, there this is. =) ] <---(bracket for less confusion? Haha, I'm lame.)

Wasn't even going to post this...




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lazydame

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April 14, 2012
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Comments

 
Sat Apr 14, 2012 03:09 AM +

I am darkness, and I approve of this blog.

 
 
Sat Apr 14, 2012 06:51 AM +

that's how i always write my blogs. I never plan them out, so sometimes I have the tab open for like 7 hours with only 1 paragraph done

 
 
Sat Apr 14, 2012 09:53 PM +

It's about time you showed your face around here, you little punk-ass hoe bitch. I tried contacting you on BasilMarket, like, two years ago now to do something.

 
 
Sun Apr 15, 2012 02:31 AM +

Nass said: that's how i always write my blogs. I never plan them out, so sometimes I have the tab open for like 7 hours with only 1 paragraph done


sounds like my english essays!

 
 
Sun Apr 15, 2012 04:22 PM +

omghai

 

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