Okay, I know I'm not the brightest crayon in the box but I'm not fucking dumb. Let's talk about my idiot friend. For blog's sake, we'll call her Jennifer. She has a boyfriend, who also happens to be my friend, and for blog's sake, his name is James. Now, James and Jennifer have been together 2 years. James is 17 and Jennifer is 16.
James and Jennifer are both each other's first loves. Now, that's fucking awesome. They were both each other's first kisses and they lost their virginity to each other. Now, that would be okay if Jennifer loved James. Jennifer doesn't love James. She can't stand James. She's just with James because she feels as if she's obligated or she has to be with him. Now, as a friend, I was worried. She's risking her happiness because of some misplaced sense of loyalty.
Now, recently, she's bestowed a certain wisdom upon me. She thinks she's pregnant. That's right. SHE THINKS SHE'S PREGNANT. My first instinct was to beat the shit out of James. I know she wasn't consenting to the sex seeing as she always talked about how he wouldn't get off her when she asked. I knew he initiated. I knew he forced himself upon her. Okay, when she told me the first the she said afterwards was "Do you think he'll leave if I am?" I responded "You probably shouldn't haven't have fucked a guy you don't trust to be with you when times get tough..." Pretty insensitive but true. I don't care. I then told her that I would have her back if he does leave. Now, crap, I've brought myself into it. I can't help this lovable idiot raise a kid. I said it to be nice.
Now, I asked her what the fuck she was thinking and she said "I wasn't thinking." Fair enough, you're fucking dumb but fair enough. I told her she wasn't pregnant and that she used protection. In the past, when I voiced my concerns she reassured me they always had. She responded "We don't."
"You don't what...?"
"YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU! I can't believe you're throwing your life away over something so trivial like sex with a guy you don't even fucking like. If you're pregnant, I'm castrating him and I'm fucking serious."
"...I'm sorry, Dustin. Please stop."
"No, I'm worried about you, Jennifer..."
"Worried about what?"
"What the fuck did I just say...?"
"Well, I can think of a few reasons you would be worried..."
"You're my best friend and I'm not going to watch you throw your life away."
"I think you love me."
"Fuck you" "I love you but not that way. I'm just worried about you.."
Dumbest bitch ever. Lovable...but dumb as shit. God, stuff like that frustrates me beyond belief.
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